Thursday, June 28, 2007

Slayer? I hardly knew her!

New approach to the Bar. Deadly force IS necessary. I could spend hours comparing the California Bar to a blood-sucking creature of the night, but for any of you who are in the process of studying, or have already faced the beast, this is not a revelation.




So what does any good slayer do in preparation of the Apocalypse? I've watched enough Buffy to know the answer to that one. First you train. Then you find a really hot guy you can never be with. Hopefully he helps you in your quest, but if not, well he is a hot guy. Then its staking time.

Training:
The key to training is both physical and mental and emotional.
Physical training: I got it down. Maybe that's the plus side to this bar thing, but between my evening runs and my weights I don't think my arms have been this defined since I was on the diving team. Diane was concerned I might not be working out (see every Watcher looks out for their slayer). Not to worry Diane. I spent so long on the Erg yesterday some little old lady stopped by to ask if I had rowed to Catalina. And then she proceeded to sing to me. (Now I remember why I started running and stopped going to the gym).

Mental training: 10-12 hours of studying a day? Ummm yeah....I think my brain is fried.

Emotional training: I'm totally psyching myself up for this. I CAN beat this thing. I CAN beat this thing. No mercy. It's kill or be killed and I'm in no mood to be killed. Of course, I've also looked into becoming a permanent dog washer, you know, just in case. I'm good with dogs. And there's always basketball.........

The hot guy I can never be with:
Jon vetoed. Stupid Jon. I guess he doesn't want me to pass the Bar. Selfish.

The Tools:
Anyone else noticed that a sharpened No. 2 pencil bears a striking resemblance to another sharp pointy object used to kill vampires? Coincidence? I think not.

2 comments:

  1. Train! Train! Train! You are doing a great job. You have a very good Watcher.

    Can I be Willow? Or Xander? Or your trusted stake?

    ReplyDelete
  2. YOU CAN DO IT! Kick the bar's ass!

    ReplyDelete